Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Oh, drunken ramblings!

Sometimes I feel as if it is only when you feel that you have experienced rock bottom, or encountered people that have, that life is truly experienced. I met someone for the first time tonight... No...Wait....Two people for the first time tonight. Only with the companion of beer or the alcohol of choice, did we truly start to reveal our own true selves. Sometimes that is really how it goes, unfortunately I have not the courage to reveal my own personal and deeply felt feelings to the world.

Something that makes me want to cry every night is that fact that no one knows me truly, deeply, and madly. Frank Lee may be right. I think that I need to reach rock bottom before I truly experience life. After hearing his stories and times, do I feel like I am alive. This is such a strange phenomenon in the world. Only until you have experienced the bottom, the essence, of life that you are truly able to experience it. It is troubled with your own thoughts, feelings, and worries; but after tonight I felt as if I have never been alive at all. He told me tonight that the worst is yet to come, but only after the worst is experienced, you will truly experience love and life. I think that now or something that is close to now will spark and fuel this fire for love, But until now, it is only a figment or a fragment of my own reality. I will refrain from becoming too philosophical on life at the moment.

Life is about a few close friends and a beer to stimulate the conversation. This is the essence of life. This is the true definition of life and it inequities.

I am over and out,
Iowa Film Nazi

2 Comments:

Blogger Logan "Barry" Anderson said...

Wow thats deep, but hooray to true friends and hooray to beer!

3/01/2006 8:32 PM  
Anonymous Victoria said...

I truly agree that beer brings friends together. Some of my best conversations have been over alcohol (sometimes a little too much alcohol) but that is the time, unfortunately, when a lot of us are actually honest. I wish we could all be honest everyday-- I wish we could say the things we want to say and not be afraid of the outcomes. But that won't change. So the moral of your blog is, of course:

Keep drinking!

I have never experienced what I consider to be rock bottom. I have never been brave enough to let myself get that low. Once I felt myself getting close and I stopped and turned around-- I didn't want to go through with it. I do, however, know some people who have experienced this and I believe what you say is true: they change immensely.

Good luck with figuring everything out... I know we don't really get the chance to talk all that much, but it sounds like you're doing some soul searching.

3/02/2006 6:18 PM  

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