When did life become so exhausting?

There is no stopping life, there is however a stop to us: Death. Today I feel like death is the next time that rest will come around. Well....perhaps I mean the only time that I will feel truly rested. I woke up, after not being able to sleep until early in the morn, to feeling the most tired in my life. The accuracy of that statement is not 100% true, but it sure felt like it. My body aches from the amount of movement that I have put forth in the past few days. My shoulder moans and groans, like it has a life of its own and has freed itself from my regime. The pops and cracks turn heads in the bustle of human traffic. "You might want to get that checked out," says a friend in passing.

My current life is become a chore. Too many obligations plague my daily life, I have yet to find a true balance. Radio shows and TV broadcasts bore me. I have always had a desire to find new things to keep me creative, I think a portion of me is being unfulfilled. I need a new experience to try and master. It is more important to throw off the shackles of normalcy.

Enough for now....I guess nothing new.

better to be a sound than an echo

Too much in our society has revered the bold and adventurous. It is partly our own fault. These men are great examples of what to be or not, but only examples. We are in part killing ourselves with this idolization of the great, we cripple ourselves. I would use a quote from Emerson, but that would be against the purpose of this little rant. We need to be ourselves and not what society wants us to be. Defying convention is something that we must do every day, but more often than not we are disabled from doing so. America and citizens of the world are far to concerned on what others think. Government and order are the enemy. Most are disturbed to hear of this, but it is true. Government is for the people who are afraid of life in the world without structure.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now switching topics, I must throw out a praise for my peer Clifford for his excellent blogs as of late. The pressure for me to write with the same fervor of life and creating enthralling observations. The one that struck a chord with me has to be "Tuesday 9". This is an example of good writing, it should be personal yet universal to the world. Isolation is something that I have felt more often than not. It is the theme of our generation. We were raised into a land filled with people who are only concerned with your money and time, the MTV generation. The marketing of the youth, we were manipulated to think life was about popularity and fame. When the truth life was revealed from underneath the shell of superficiality, we were left of the marrow of life. But alas, it was too late. We had to start all over again, building ourselves up from the root. Some started in high school, some earlier, some later. But the point is that the beginning of our life was a false start, a scratch in the long jump of life. Mine lasted 20 years. How long was yours?

Technology, the Drug of Choice

Man's worst enemy has to be technology. It allows us to conquer out fears , just to create new ones. Technology advances society, and kills the soul. Walden was written because of technology, why don't we go back. We can't! Technology made us go too far. Society forget to ask itself whether we any more.

I think a lot of problems arise out of our current trend of isolationism. It is a great ism'. We all retreat to our own little rooms with our computers and TV's. Why would we ever want to leave our room. It is too God damn comfortable! I look around my room now, I see stacks of books and DVD's cluttering my bookshelves- not to mention the massive TV that commands the room, demanding that it be used. The 20's had pianos, the 00's have state of the art theater systems. I blame you not Cliff for your crimes of isolation. I, too, am comfortable in my 12 x 20 concrete-enforced castle.

This is why I have fascinated about moving away from this modern soul crushing society. I need to get back to the Earth, make myself simple again. Fuck crack and heroine, technology is the hardest drug to quit cold turkey. There is no treatment, no cure. Technology gives one of the greatest highs in the world, but like all drugs will render you with a crash-down that will make you cease to function. If you doubt my words, then you are either an addict or have never had a taste of the sweet nectar.

Writing this makes me feel better about my own problems with technology, but only in the minimal sense. For I am weak and helpless, leaving technology will turn me into a jellyfish washed up on shore. Like the rest of my generation, I will never be able to quit this drug. I am not going to be too depressed about this, I will forget all about this a few minutes into the next episode of LOST. Fuck me sideways! This world sucks, too bad I am too lazy to do anything about it.

Hey have you heard of Capote? No, well then see it!

Although this past month was the worst of the year, I was still pleased by the releases that Sioux City recieved. This is mostly due to the fact that Sioux City is a black hole of culture. In regards to the films that this city has recently recieved are Brokback Mountain, Capote, and Good Night, and Good Luck. These three have probably locked out most of the major categories for the Oscar race this month. All of them fine films and moved me deeply.

Brokeback, although about a homosexual relationship, can be related to various different things. I feel that I could relate to it because of my feelings towards different films. When you live in a college dorm, you are expected to fall in line with a certain amount of affinaty towards stupid comedies that are filled with vile shock humor that is meant to kill the soul. Granted, I will watch a few of them, and enjoy it sometimes too. But when you are forced to watch it repeatedly, it is if my friends are trying to destroy my soul. But when the time arises to discuss an Akira Kurosawa film, they scatter faster than the bugs underneth rock.

The next was Good Night, and Good Luck. Hands down makes me believe what professor Heistad has been saying about Ed Murrow and his reasons for worshipping the man. In a time of political crisis, he stood up to the government and Senator McCarthy in the heat of the "red scare" that grabbed hold of the nation. I am not going to review this film on my blog, for that is saved for the highly praised Collegian Reporter, and I would hate to have my review out before offering a first stab to my humble publisher.

The last one I will talk about is Capote. I was utterly amazed by this film to say the least. There are few movies that have shocked me to my core, but this is one of them. I was thinking about this many hours after I viewed it because it captured the true nature of obsession and desire. Capote researched about a Kansas family murder for 4 years of his life before completion his non-fiction novel. Not only did he make this novel interesting, he shocked the world with it. He made non-fiction just as interesting at fiction.

Although this is not what drove me to love this film so much, it still added to the enjoyment. The thing that shocked my core was the way that Capote obsessed about the killer. "It's as if Perry and I grew up in the same house. And one day he went out the back door and I went out the front." He obsessed about this killer because he found something in him that was similar to himself, he made a monster of society into a human. Not only was this monster made into a human, but one that was just as scared as the rest of us. It is as if there was a thread that separated us from them, the thread is society restraints. Theirs was trimmed through a series of systematic rejection from members of their circle of life that were meant to take care of them and build them up. This obsession or drive to find about what differed him from the killer drove him to devote several years of his life to search for this information that only seemed to be aviable through his relationship with Perry.